This one is called:
יִשָׁקֵנִי מִנְּשִׁיקוֹת פִּיהוּ
I don't sing that one when Shlomo can hear me, haha!
I think I nearly said it aloud one day at a village feast or maybe he heard me think it?
Oooh! Sorry! That wont make any sense to you!
Haha! I'm such a ditz!
Umm, let me try and translate. It's kind of like "I want him to kiss me with his mouth's kisses". But that sounds kinda weird. It's really more like: "I wish he'd caress me with all the kisses his mouth can conjure".
You get the idea!
You can see why I didn't sing it when Shlomo was near!
My language is called Ivreet, by the way. It's kind of a bit like what you might know as Hebrew.
Maybe I did say it aloud? Maybe my girlfriends heard me and told him? Maybe he just saw the way I was looking at him and plucked up the courage?
One minute I'm serving wine at the feast, along with my girlfriends, when Shlomo comes in with his contribution of olives and olive oil.
All the girls made a fuss, as they usually do. So predictable!
Anyway, next thing I know he's leaned in and is kissing me. Not just on the cheek, like. Didn't stop at my mouth either. I got him to pause eventually when I said:
כִּי טוֹבִים דֹּדֶיךָ מִיָּיִן
That's telling him that his loving is better than wine.
Well, more like, I'm already a bit tiddly from the wine I've been drinking, but if you keep intoxicating me with kissing like that, you'll light who knows what kind of fire in my belly?
And we were kind of in public, so, I took a breath and deflected further:
לְרֵיחַ שְׁמָנֶיךָ טוֹבִים
"The waft of your oil is lovely," I announced, which put him on the back foot a bit.
I couldn't help having a little dig at his expense.
שֶׁמֶן תּוּרַק שְׁמֶךָ
"You have a reputation for being generous with your oil."
"Ooh!" said all the girls in chorus. They knew what I meant!
What you don't get the joke?
Well, let's just say that we didn't use olive oil just for cooking, if you know what I mean.
Here I was digging myself right back into the hole I had been trying to climb out of.
עַל־כֵּן עֲלָמוֹת אֲהֵבוּךָ
"No wonder the young women like you!"
The girls cracked up at that. To his credit, so did Shlomo, even if he was blushing furiously by then.
I had to bring an end to this, so simply said to him:
מָשְׁכֵנִי
"Get me out of here!"
and all the girls went:
אַחֲרֶיךָ נָרוּצָה
"We'll follow you too!"
That was not at all in the spirit of my little repartee with Shlomo. So, we waited until their merriment diverted them elsewhere.
He went first.
I slipped away quietly and caught up with him. We walked arm in arm outside the hamlet.
He took me to a little secret grotto he must have spied, so in the mischievous spirit of the afternoon I said:
הֱבִיאַנִי הַמֶּלֶךְ חֲדָרָיו
"His majesty has brought me to his inner sanctum!"
His response was urgent, both pleading and confident:
נָגִילָה וְנִשְׂמְחָה בָּךְ
"Let's undress and have a good time together!"
I said:
נַזְכִּירָה דֹדֶיךָ מִיַּיִן
"Let's make memories of how your love-making compares to wine"
So, we did, and as he intoxicated me, I whispered:
מֵישָׁרִים אֲהֵבוּךָ
"Your love-making is so smooth."
Must have been the olive oil.
So, yeah, anyway that's one of my songs.
I hear you still have it around in your time too.
Someone thought it would be a good idea to include it in some religious canon.
Well, it suppose it was kind of a spiritual experience.
But that's some round-about trip for a song from a horny shepherdess three thousand years ago.
Makes me wonder if I was too cryptic. Or maybe it got a bit lost in translation?
And found its way into the Old Testament. (Song of Solomon chapter 1 verses 1-4.)
So, dancing and hand claps to everyone for that.